Fri. Oct 30th, 2020

Hey, I'm new to this sub after another bender this weekend when I told myself very firmly it wouldn't happen again, I'm starting to finally accept that I might not be as in much control as I think I am. This is what I imagine the start of a long journey and I have read so much amazing stuff here already.I wanted to ask for some perspective. A lot of what you read and view about addiction is that it is used as an escape from the shitty aspects of life. But I really love my life? I have a partner, a good job. I had a rough childhood but I really value my life now. Yet I still get so seduced by that chase to the point that I forget, and don't go home, rather keep chasing that night (and morning…) So I guess my question is whether one is still an addict when one isn't necessarily escaping? I'm just having so many thoughts as I scroll through this page so I hope this isn't too convoluted! Thanks for all that you're doing here.